For a Peaceful (Serena) Life
Who is a life coach and what do they do?
I think it’s helpful to start with what life coaching actually is. We’re talking about a discipline — or rather, a journey — that helps people reconnect with their own lives: how we experience different areas of life, what goals we want to set for ourselves, and how we can cultivate deep satisfaction for what already exists. It’s about gaining awareness through self-knowledge and allowing ourselves to flourish. From this comes the role of the life coach: supporting a person in understanding certain situations and/or emotions, while providing the tools needed to face life’s challenges. These situations can vary greatly: a major life change, fears that prevent us from making choices for ourselves, or beliefs that limit our growth. Naturally, everything depends on the individual, because what feels important to me at this stage of my life may not feel important to you.
How did the desire to support others through life coaching begin?
It all started from my personal experience. I have a background in sociology and I’ve always been fascinated by everything related to the human psyche. After completing my bachelor’s degree, I chose a more educational and creative path: I spent a lot of time learning, reading books, attending conferences, and listening to podcasts. Then one day, completely by chance, I met a Portuguese life coach and became fascinated by her work. Around that same time, I had just launched the Essere Serena project, so I had already begun exploring content around inner wellbeing, although I never imagined I would also help people in such a practical way.
Until a few years ago, life coaching wasn’t widely discussed. What changed, and what role did social media play?
Social media has certainly contributed to the change. However, life coaching is still stigmatized: many people think it’s nonsense, a waste of time, or ineffective — much like therapy was perceived for a long time. The problem is that people often resist what they don’t know. At the same time, while platforms have helped normalize these conversations, we also have to remember that social media shows only a carefully selected 1% of real life. In some cases, it can even promote unrealistic lifestyles or ideas that simply don’t exist. Since content isn’t regulated in this sense, it all depends on the ethics of the person sharing it. If someone only presents the perfect side of their life while hiding the fragile moments we all inevitably experience, they spread a misleading — and potentially harmful — message. Despite these risks, I still believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages because, thanks to these platforms, we now have access to information that just a few years ago would have been inaccessible or limited to highly specialized environments such as universities. The important thing is to have a strong educational foundation and to carefully choose our “content diet.”
Not everyone can afford therapy. Can life coaching provide support in these cases?
Absolutely. Life coaching can be seen as a form of empowerment because it helps people develop greater awareness and confidence. However, it does not replace therapy, since it does not address clinical aspects. One beautiful aspect of coaching is that it creates connection, especially when practiced within a community. Often, during a personal growth journey, people focus — understandably — on themselves, believing that no one else is experiencing the same struggles. This creates a sense of loneliness that, through Essere Serena Circle (guided practices, self-discovery exercises, and weekly group life coaching sessions), I’m trying to gradually dismantle. Beyond the individual practices, it’s the exchange with like-minded people and the realization that we are not alone that truly changes us.
What impact do the words we say to ourselves have?
Language is crucial. It’s important to understand where our inner dialogue comes from because, once we begin paying attention, we realize that the critical inner voice we sometimes hear almost always originates from past experiences that taught us to believe we are not enough. Of course, simply repeating positive affirmations in the mirror is not enough if we don’t truly believe them, because the body perceives that disconnect. Everything is interconnected, which is why I also specialized in the somatic aspect: our body communicates with the brain, so we need to learn how to understand it and how it functions.
What role do society’s expectations play in all of this?
We live in a performance-driven society, where we are constantly being evaluated. In this context, it becomes difficult for people to explore their authenticity and talents while detaching themselves from others’ expectations. We are always searching for something outside ourselves, but once we achieve it, we often realize it wasn’t what we were truly looking for — and so the cycle begins again. “I’ll only be happy when I graduate, when I find a job, when I have a family of my own.” In this way, the finish line keeps moving further away. Life coaching, instead, helps us find balance and alignment with who we already are and what we already have, because a peaceful life can only exist when it is aligned with the values, feelings, and actions that genuinely resonate with us.